I’m really, really, really trying to be more mindful. I’m really, really, really trying to direct my thoughts towards love when I’m afraid (or angry). I’m really, really, really trying to use my brain to let myself enjoy more, delight in more more, and play more.
It’s funny that it’s so easy to forget to do these things. Six o’clock will roll around and I’ll suddenly realize that I haven’t practiced any of my mental exercises. I haven’t stretched myself to notice and appreciate the sunshine or warm breeze. I’ve mindlessly gone through too many interactions and too many moments. I’ve been unconscious on some level.
But even just remembering that I haven’t been doing these things is an opportunity to about face and start doing them. Or at least to start doing one of them.
How delightful my day might be if I went out of my way to find every little delicious moment and relished it. Each instant is precious and fleeting, and it’s not like I can hold onto anything forever, but I certainly can be more present when I’m present and I can revel in what’s around me and within me…if I choose to and remember to.
I was taking my son to the doctor the other day. He had a rash that wouldn’t go away and we needed help. As we drove down the street on the way to the doctor we joked and played, and I made myself appreciate how lucky I am. How lucky I am that he still enjoys being with me and I enjoy being with him. How lucky I am to laugh and play. How lucky I am that the sun is shining and it’s the middle of the day and I’m taking a break from work and he’s taking a break from school and we’re together and we adore each other’s company. At least usually.
Each day offers me countless moments and opportunities – a walk this morning with a friend, a great call with a potential client that may yield me business, a strong response from a potential agent, curled up on the couch with my son watching Dr. Who, a yummy dinner – countless chances to see what’s working and delight in it. Or to see what’s wrong.
There’s a time to see what’s wrong…so we can fix it. But today I want to find, and savor, every delicious moment.
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