My past modus operandi: take the hardest path and plow through.
I don’t know if any of you are like me, but not only did I pretty much never choose an easier choice, I didn’t even open my mind to consider an easier choice. I didn’t even know an easier choice existed.
I had been trained, or I trained myself, to hunker down and push through anything. And everything. I don’t know if I thought I had to prove something, or if that’s how I knew I was worthwhile, or if I simply didn’t get that there was another option. I do know that, as if on automatic pilot, when faced with a decision about whether to take the difficult road or the painless one, it wasn’t a decision. It just was. Whether to do the thing that scared me or something a lot less traumatizing? Again, not a decision. It just was.
Then I was faced with a challenge around Danny, my dad. Simply put, his cable TV remote wasn’t working – again – and he lives over an hour away. Sure, it wasn’t working most likely because he pushes the wrong buttons and makes it not work, but it wasn’t working. I called the nurse’s station at his nursing home to ask them to go in and push the right buttons and fix it. According to him it didn’t happen. I called again and asked again. They promised they’d send maintenance right in to help him. According to Danny it didn’t happen. I agonized over how soon I could take a day to drive up to see him and push the buttons for him…and how would I teach him not to push the wrong buttons the day after I left?
Then I called Comcast. I realized that it was worth the $100 charge – or whatever – to get Danny a working TV now. Not when I could make it to see him in a few weeks. Now. I chose the easy way and it felt great!
And while I was on the phone with them, the very, very nice customer service rep told me that I could pay $5.95 a month to get him a service contract, so that whenever he pushed the wrong buttons and his remote was no longer working, one simple call to Comcast would send a technician over to push the right buttons for him again. For FREE!
It was almost too easy. I said yes.
I’ve learned a few things about choosing the easy way:
- It’s okay to do it.
- Just do it.
- If you feel guilty about doing it, it’s probably a good choice.
- You feel a sense of ease when you’re done – or even partway through. As if a boulder that you didn’t even know was on your chest, falls off your chest. If that’s not a sign, what is?
- You have to look beyond what you know. I’ll admit it. It was my husband who suggested I just call Comcast in the first place (as I agonized over what and when and how to do this). And it was the Comcast rep who offered the monthly contract.
- It’s okay to ask for help. And to ask for help again.
- I like the easy choice.
Yes, I’ve learned that I like the easy choice better. I enjoy having less to prove. I delight in breathing in ease and relishing the space my easy choices give me.
It’s not always the easiest choice to make. But I’m making it more and more.
I’d love to hear your thoughts, and please share this post with others if it resonates with you!
Good one. Some times when I wake up and think about all I have to do, I go get coffee and just stay home. Easy way out but some times necessary. Don’t always have to DO. xo
I LOVE that. I just go get coffee and stay home! Thanks for being an inspiration on not DOING! xo
It is so true-and often the easiest, most obvious solution just isn’t that obvious. I am embarrassed at how often I can make my life more stressful or complicated than it ever needs to be. Good choice, Lisa–and thanks for the Comcast tip.
And thank you for reminding me, again, not to make my life more stressful or complicated than it ever needs to be!
Lisa, I like your story. As we get older, experience teaches us to be more efficient. Your easy way out is also a smarter option.
Thanks Lena! Efficiency and easy is good.