Sometimes, as if out of nowhere, I ache. I don’t know why. There’s nothing going on that has set me off. There’s nothing upsetting in my immediate surroundings, or even my recent past. I just ache.
It’s a heartache. A soreness. As if I hurt for past hurts. As if I mourn, or grieve, again or more.
I’ve learned to let the pain flow through me. I’ve learned to not interpret it, or worry about it. I’ve learned to look, as always, for ease and peace.
I now know that ease and peace are within me. I now know that calm and stillness are a breath away. A mindful breath away.
The ache began during meditation. Was there something underlying that I’m not aware of? Is there something underlying that I’m not aware of?
No worries. I don’t need to know. I know I am okay.
I think you can have phantom emotional pains. At least I can have phantom emotional pains. I can ache and still know I’m not a person who is always in pain. I’m not tormented anymore.
I can ache, at times, and have compassion. I suppose there is a depth of pain inside me that, at times, seeps out.
I can look for comfort and contentment. I can look for delight and laughter. I can let my phantom pain be, and know it will pass.
It always does.
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