I was meditating the other day, listening to the chanting sound playing on my Insight Timer app, and I realized I was not thinking anything. I was not lost in thought.
“Wow,” I then thought, “I’m getting really good at meditating.”
I guess I’m not. I guess thinking I’m getting really good at meditating is my mind getting lost in thought, even if it’s thought about meditating. I guess noticing that I’m not thinking anything is still thinking something, even if it’s thinking about not thinking anything.
I am meditating more steadily, pretty much every day. It feels good to quiet my mind. It feels good to sit and notice and feel and not think…too much. My mind is so often going, going, going. I think fast; I talk fast; I move fast. My mind is fast, and slowing it down once a day is probably really good for me.
I attended a Mindfulness conference a few weeks ago, and someone shared that it takes only eight minutes a day of meditation and quiet for our brains to reap the benefits. I feel the benefits (at least I think I do). I feel calmer more often, and able to calm down more often and easily. I still have my irrational thoughts and fears, but I feel like I’m more able to call them out as irrational thoughts and fears. And to breathe through them more easily.
I must be getting good at mediating. ☺
See how funny it is, how easy it is to think it’s something that we’re supposed to get good at? To think that it’s a state of enlightenment we’re supposed to achieve?
I think that thinking I’m getting good at meditating while I’m meditating is down right funny. And maybe that’s the enlightenment I’m trying to achieve.
I must be getting good at meditating. ☺
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