There is a lot of talk about grit these days. Grit and resilience. How we have, perhaps, coddled our children too much, and they therefore don’t have enough grit or resilience. Or any maybe.
I don’t know if that’s true, and I’m pretty sure my kiddos are gritty. But what I really know is that I am resilient. I wouldn’t be here – and I wouldn’t be here as healthily as I am – if I wasn’t.
What I also know is that while I am resilient, I am ready to define myself that way a bit less.
I am ready to “get through” things a little less determinedly. To employ all the tools I know and self-care practices I can find (and remember) a little less hard. To push past and soldier on and “be okay anyway” a little less pushingly.
I am ready for even more joy and even more ease. Even more soothing, without having as many reasons that I need soothing, other than the fact that soothing simply feels good.
Sure, I have a lot in my past to heal from, and sure, I’ll probably be healing, in some form, for the rest of my life. I will always – happily and thankfully – put my hand on my heart and feel my love pour into, over, and through me. I will gather up all the scared and wounded parts of me – and all the joyful and exuberant parts of me – into my arms and my heart and shower them with love. I will ground. I will breathe. I will notice beauty. I will LOVE WITH ALL MY HEART.
That said, I will also acknowledge all the parts of my life and my being that don’t need resilience (even as I gather up strength to go visit Danny – my dad – in the nursing home, as that does need resilience).
I guess I’m reminding myself that I’m thankful for all of me, even – and maybe sometimes especially – the resilient parts of me. And I’m also reminding myself that I don’t have to fight, to push, to prove, to convince, to suffer, to defend, to get through, to push past, to soldier on, to be okay anyway…
I don’t have to be resilient.
I can just be. Resilience and all.
How about you?
I’d love to hear your thoughts, and please share this post with others if it resonates with you!
Photo by Motoki Tonn on unsplash