Easy is still somewhat new for me.
Well, it’s not new, because I remember decades ago when my then therapist told me I could take the easy choice in a situation. It astounded me at the time, because I “knew” that I always had to take the harder choice so that I could prove – prove that I was strong, prove that I could do whatever was put in front of me, prove my worth.
That is all a lie, and that is all the cult talking, literally, because I was raised to be a heavenly soldier. I was praised for living without my mom and never missing her. I was best friends with the ‘Messiah’s’ children and knew how sinful and unworthy I was. Always.
Again, that is all a lie and all the cult talking, but it was carved into my brain. Carved well and carved deeply, which is why easy – and taking the easy choice – can still be somewhat new for me.
But that is my current goal and guideline – to let things be easy, to let me be easy, and to take it easy.
I don’t have to work so hard at proving my worth – or proving anything for that matter. I don’t have to work so hard to make sure everyone is okay. I don’t have to work so hard at anything anymore…even my healing process. Even at letting things be easy.
I can let it be easy. I can let it unfold. I can know it’s all okay and I’m all okay.
As someone whose brother once said, “You even try to do not perfect perfectly,” I need to watch for my compulsion to work hard at letting it be easy.
And just let it be.
I choose easy. I choose simple. I choose allowing – and choosing – that for me.
How about you?
I’d love to hear your thoughts, and please share this post with others if it resonates with you!
