I am feeling a lot of feels these days. So much to process. So much to let be or let go or let in. So much to work through. Or at least feel through.

In each moment, I also have a choice. A choice to feel as good as I can feel. And to let that be enough.

I sometimes feel pressure from myself to be okay enough and good. I sometimes feel pressure from others. I’m letting that be okay too. It’s finding that balance between reaching for soothing and ease and letting wherever I am be okay. Be okay enough. Be good enough.

Sometimes I feel stronger, and sometimes I don’t. Sometimes it feels easy, and sometimes it feels hard. Sometimes I feel surrounded with love, and sometimes I feel so alone.

Feel as good as I can feel right now, and let that be enough.

I know too many people who are moving through tough times. Physical challenges. Mental pain. Harsh situations.

Life can be hard.

And life can be beautiful. Or at least beautiful enough. Beautiful enough for right here. Right now.

Feel as good as I can feel right now, and let that be enough.

The other day I smelled Danny (my dad). I had been talking to him. Asking him if he was around. If he was with me. Telling him I could use some support. Someone else in my corner. To know he was there. Caring for me.

Then I smelled him. First whilst I was doing dishes and then a bit later on the other side of the kitchen. (I told my kid that I had smelled him. “Not cigarettes or body odor,” I said. “What other smell did he have?” they asked.)

It felt good.

I continue to move through. Be present. Be gentle with myself. Put my hand on my heart. Breathe and ground and let myself be okay. Okay enough.

Feel as good as I can feel right now, and let that be enough.

(This post feels a bit weird and clunky. Hopefully it’s okay enough for you. Hopefully it gives you something of what you need today too. If not, there’s always next time…)

I’d love to hear your thoughts, and please share this post with others if it resonates with you!

Photo by Anton Kraev on unsplash


If you have been in ANY high control group or religion, share your story with the hashtag #IGotOut. Share on your own platform OR if you need to be anonymous and/or would like support, there are resources at the @igotout_org website.

When you see a survivor share their story, let them know they have been heard. This is such a meaningful part of the movement. We all need to know we’re not alone.

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