This popped up on my mindspace reminder last week. It annoyed me. Perhaps especially since it’s so true. It also called me out on how much I want things to be different at times.

I sent it to a dearest, who is having nearly the toughest of times. It might have annoyed them as well, but they’re too sweet to tell me that.

How many times do I have to remember that “acceptance is the answer to all my problems” before it really sinks in? Since I’ve been at it since I first heard that in 1987 (when I crawled into Al-Anon), probably a very, very, very long time.

I’m finding space in my brain for acknowledging that things are not as I want them to be, but not getting caught up in wanting them to be different. Or at least not needing them to be different. (#nosurprise, this goes for people too.)

My health and energy levels are not where I want them to be. They’re better. Way better. And maybe this is where they’ll stay. But I miss what they were.

And when I want it (and me) to be different, it is harder. I am tenser.

Again, I don’t think it’s about not noticing that I wish things were not as they are, but there’s noticing and then there’s getting hooked in.

So I practice my practices of looking for what’s right and what’s good. The text support and love I can give to friends (more dearests) who are struggling and suffering right now. The fact that I can “run” (very, very, very slowly) and bike and, as of last week, practice yoga and lift. My hammock time. My yellow birds.

I look for the things that I’m okay with how they are, and I see if I can be a little bit okay with the things that are not okay.

Note – this doesn’t make the big not okay things in the world at all okay. And it doesn’t mean we have to tolerate abuse in any way, because “that’s the way it is.” Those are all things that I am committed to being part of the change and to making a difference about.

To me this means feeling my tension, breathing deeply, putting my hand on my heart, letting it be, accepting it is what is, and looking for something to soothe and ease me.

I’d love to hear your thoughts, and please share this post with others if it resonates with you!

Photo by Jared Rice on unsplash

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