I was on the phone with a client the other day, reminding them that being human and messy is normal and good. It’s still something I’m learning, day by day, and it’s also something I can teach and share.
I feel particularly messy right now, and I’m sitting with it and letting it be.
I’m letting fear and anger and sadness and anxiety and…and…and…bubble up and envelop me. I am sitting with them and inviting them to tea – as the Buddha invited the demon god Mara to sit and have tea.
I am letting it be okay that I am sad. It makes sense. I am letting it be okay that I’m in overwhelm. That makes sense too. I am letting the emotions wash through me – not stopping them, not pushing them away, not even getting stuck in them. I am welcoming them, observing them with compassion, and holding them to my heart.
I am putting my hand on my heart and breathing. I am recognizing all the young “parts” of me that are still angry and sad and confused and afraid. They weren’t allowed to feel and express those “bad” feelings then, so I let myself feel and express them now. I let the feelings come and go…and I remind myself that I’m an adult now. That all the things that were too big and scary and overwhelming when I was young don’t have to be now. Back then, I didn’t really have anyone to protect and take care of me. Now I have me. Adult me.
I also remind myself that “feelings aren’t facts.” (Thank you Al-Anon.) That they’ll pass. That there is also so much beauty and joy and okay-ness surrounding and in me.
That right here, right now, I am okay.
I feel messy and I am okay. Both are true.
I’d love to hear your thoughts, and please share this post with others if it resonates with you!
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