Category Archives: Hope and Amazement

Just breathe. Just be.

Hope and Amazement,

Every time I breathe consciously, I ground myself. Every time I remember to pay attention to where I am – when I notice my feet on the ground, my butt in my seat, my fingers on the keyboard of my computer – I build a stronger foundation with which to move forward. When I pay attention to how I am – when I observe my breath, the beating of my heart, my calmness (or lack thereof) – I remind myself to be.

It is so easy to get caught up in the busyness. It is so easy to rush forward, not seeing where I am, not present to what’s going on around – and inside – of me.

But when I breathe. When I pause. When I intentionally notice, there is so much to notice. There is so much to enjoy. To relish.

All I have to do is stop.

All I have to do is stop trying. Stop trying to make it better. Stop trying to make it more. Stop trying to achieve and overachieve.

Stop trying to keep myself safe (because I am safe). Stop trying to make up for all that’s wrong with me (because nothing is wrong with me). Stop trying to anticipate and solve and soothe everyone and everything around me.

My husband teases me at times. “Get out of your head,” he jokes. “Stop thinking about everything so much.” Not thinking about everything so much does not come naturally to me. I’m trained at reading the room, assessing the danger points, and noting what people want and need – even before they note it at times. My warped reasoning can reason that these skills kept me safe when I was younger, so these skills are needed to keep me safe now.

I no longer need to be mindful of the lay of the land to be safe. I am safe. I just need to be mindful. And more mindful.

I just need to breathe. And be.

I’d love to hear your thoughts, and please share this post with others if it resonates with you!

Photo by Fabian Møller on Unsplash

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I am love

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For quite some time now, my mantra has been “I choose love.”

When I am afraid, I remind myself “I choose love.” It soothes me. When I’m trying too hard or pushing too much, “I choose love,” calms me down and eases me. When I am frustrated, or frustrating, “I choose love” helps me to come from love and compassion. (For myself and others.)

“I choose love” is my mantra.

But the other day in my yoga class, as the instructor challenged us to set an intention for our practice (and our day), what popped into my mind was, “I am love.”

I am love embodied. As are you. I am the love of the universe, the love of those around me, the love that soars in my heart when I let it – when I let myself be.

I do believe in love. I believe in hope. And joy. And peace. Even as things are tough all around us. I believe in fighting many good fights and throwing my effort into bringing about the changes – into being the changes – I wish to see in the world. This past weekend I was lucky to be able to March in New York City – and to see the city awash with people with signs, with chants, with camaraderie, and with hope.

I saw love there. I see love all around me. I see love inside me.

There are moments that feel dark, and when they lift and the lightness and love come, there’s nearly no better feeling. When love is filling me – or I’m pouring it out to others (or pouring it into myself, with a cup of warm tea and a snuggle down on the couch with a good book) – there is nothing better.

I am love. I can choose to be love. I can choose to feel love. I can choose love.

And I do.

I’d love to hear your thoughts, and please share this post with others if it resonates with you!

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There is hope after…

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I want everyone to know that there is hope.

I remember when I felt hopeless. When things felt like too much, and I felt like too little. I remember when my brother came to stay with me one night when I didn’t want to be alone, because I had lost hope. I remember when – all those years ago – there seemed like there would never be a break from my anguish, never be a release of my traumas and terrors. I remember when – just recently – I fell back into my fears and anguish for a bit, and again it seemed like there would never be a way out.

I’m here to say, there is.

There is hope after anguish. There is hope after pain. There is hope after suffering.

There is hope after hitting a bottom. And another bottom. And another bottom.

There is hope after remembering things you wish you didn’t remember and facing things you don’t want to face. There is hope after having a week (or weeks) when you felt like you couldn’t get off the couch. Or you actually couldn’t get off the couch.

There is hope.

I know I haven’t hit the deepest depths possible, or at least I think there are people who unfortunately have had to go even deeper into despair than I ever did. But I’m here to say there is hope after deep, dark depths.

I find hope in the little joys of life. Sunshine. Smiles. Breezes. I find hope in others. Connecting. Reminiscing. Laughing. Dancing. I find hope in reminding myself of how I’ve climbed out before and of how so many people climb out of seemingly bottomless pits.

I don’t pretend to have all the answers. I certainly don’t believe I have anything and everything everyone else needs. I obviously don’t have experiences in all the pain and anguish, or even the deepest, darkest pain and anguish.

I just know that I’ve been graced with a way out of every bottom I’ve hit (or created) and every tragedy or challenge I’ve endured. I just know that humans have an incredible, undeniable ability to adapt and evolve and renew.

And that gives me hope. Endless hope and beautiful hope. That gives me hope that there’s hope after nearly all – if not all – of it.

So, if you need it right now, hang on until you can find hope.

I’d love to hear your thoughts, and please share this post with others if it resonates with you!

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