Acceptance is the answer to all my problems

Acceptance is the answer to all my problems

Many, many years ago, when I was at an all-time low, someone shared with me page 449 of the Alcoholics Anonymous “big book.” “Read it,” they said. “Read it and reread it and reread it and remember it.” It reads like this: “And acceptance is the answer to all my...
What other people think of me is none of my business…

What other people think of me is none of my business…

I first heard this decades ago, in Al-Anon. I’ll come clean – I’m still working on it. The concept blew me away back then. I repeated it over and over to myself. I shared it with clients. I etched it on my brain. I thought I “got it.” But damn, this one is hard for...
Love myself most

Love myself most

I was listening to the Real Rebel Podcast – to Sheri Salata on the Real Rebel Podcast. And they reminded me about “love myself most.” I remember when a co-conspirator in my Positive Psychology certification course offered me her mantra – “love yourself first.” It blew...
How to survive a “Shame Slam”

How to survive a “Shame Slam”

Maybe you don’t know what a Shame Slam is. If you don’t, I’m very glad to hear that. Maybe you do, although you’ve maybe not named it that way. Or thought of it that way. Shame Slam – when I walk away from a conversation or situation – or maybe even nothing – and out...
Am I allowed to do that????

Am I allowed to do that????

Sometimes when I meet Second Gens (those of us born and/or raised in an extremist environment) from my cult, they ask me, “Why are you so healthy and whole? “I’ve been at this healing thing since before you were born,” I invariably reply. “It’s been a long, long...